Philip Joseph “P.J.” O’Connor
September 16, 1943 – March 13, 2026
Philip Joseph O’Connor was born in Salem, Massachusetts on September 16, 1943 and passed peacefully yet unwillingly on March 13, 2026 at his home in Hendersonville, North Carolina at the age of 82 after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.
Life rarely offers simple stories. It is made of choices that ripple through generations — some that heal, some that wound, and some that teach the hardest lessons. Phil O’Connor lived across three marriages and many seasons of life. To some he was a steady presence, a coach, and a man who could make the perfect banana split. To others he was distant or imperfect, leaving silences that shaped lives as much as any words spoken. Both were true. He was human.
Philip O’Connor grew up in Lynn, Massachusetts playing on award-winning sports teams. He graduated from Essex Aggie High School, attended Michigan State University, and earned a triple major in Human Resources, Business Management, and Labor Relations. His career took him from General Motors to Raytheon, LTV Vought, Dee Howard Company, EADS Sogerma, Elbit Systems, M7 Aerospace, and finally as CEO of 4M Logistics. Philip J. O’Connor was remembered by colleagues for treating every person with genuine respect and dignity.
P.J.’s simple joys included golf, cheering for the Michigan State Spartans, coaching Little League, and the pleasure of strawberry or coffee ice cream.
He is survived by his children: Mark, Bethlee McLaughlin, Brian (and wife Dr. Jennifer Freeman-O’Connor), Jessica (and husband Stephen Sadoway), and Kerry (and husband Marcus Stagliano); and by Barbara’s daughter Dr. Alyson Brink (and husband Dr. Jeremy Deans).
He was a proud grandfather to Benjamin, Christopher, Daniel O’Connor, Andrea Ortiz, Emily Sadoway, Abbey Sadoway, and Jake Sadoway, Owen McLaughlin, Ethan and Zachary O’Connor, Sara and Ian Stagliano, and many others.
He was preceded in death by his parents Philip Joseph O’Connor Sr. and Olga Paszkowski O’Connor, his brother Dennis S. O’Connor, and Barbara’s son John Joseph “J.J.” Brink IV.
Memorial Giving
Those who wish may consider a donation to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention in Philip's memory. This site does not administer or direct donations.
Our family has known the deep pain of suicide loss. We have also seen how grief, when weaponized through exclusion or severed bonds, can push already heavy hearts toward darkness. In the face of such pain, we choose compassion over cruelty, presence over erasure, and healing over silence.